Saturday was an interesting day. As I sat in the quaint tea car of the Skansen toy tram and chugged along Djurgarden, sipping coffee and eating Danish pastries on a pleasant, sunny Swedish afternoon, it was but natural that the talk between 2 single gals veer towards boys.
The friend being Swedish, the conversation soon becomes an interesting exchange of cultural insights and the traditional acceptance of male and female roles in a relationship.
While we both agreed that it is always good for the girl to work after marriage as it assures financial independancy, the question is, do we really want to be the compulsory breadwinner as well?
51% of all Swedish marriages fail and it is not even because the men are abusive.
Think about it:
A) if a girl earns enough money to support herself and every household chore and expense is equally shared between the spouses,
B) if the guy thinks that she should pay for her half of all expenses,
C) does not feel the need to look out for her because they are both equal,
the marriage is not a marriage is it? Just seems like 2 roommates with an additional 'chore' of having sex.
No matter how much civilazation progresses, men will always continue to do only that which suits them best. We all talk about equality of sexes in Sweden. It doesnt look like it has showed up completely in the salaries that men & women earn and in the way critiscisms are meted out but hey, equality shows up when you have to let the lady pass thru the doors first, on dates, on your requirement to be the provider of the family, etc. And the best part is, you get 3 months of paternity leave for just sitting at home and watching the Euro Cup!
It doesn't matter which country they live in - Developed, developing or fanatically religious countries - men will always find ways to skew the balance of the society in their favour!
What women want: A man who -
- takes pride in being the provider and yet allows the woman to earn
- loves to look after his woman without being overbearing.
Questions:
(To all women): Any additions?
(To all men): Any applicaitons?
2 comments:
The man should be the provider? Why? Being equal doesn't have to be unromantic at all - it's about giving and taking, in equal proportions.
We'll have to talk about this next time we meet!
I agree with Belinda. It's all about a give and take policy. The expenses need not be 50-50. If the husband does grocery shopping for 2weeks with his credit card, he doesn't tell his wife that the next 2 weeks has to be her turn. She will take up the responsibility herself, and even if she doesn't, y would he care ? It's all for the family. Consider a husband and wife as 1 soul, 2 bodies; a well-balanced family will have so much understanding that there is actually no need to create an expense log report. A husband and wife are far more than merely 2 roommates.
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